I have only five seconds of freedom today, and I'm going to spend it on a rant.
Who writes children's books? I really, really want to know. Because if you gave me just five seconds to write a poem, I could do better than almost anything I've found so far, at least for the soft-sided ones designed for babies.
Below are the contents of the most recent insult, purchased because it's made of cloth and small (3 x 3) so she won't keep hitting herself in the face with it like she does the bigger ones. She also will sit up with this one and flip the little foam pages as if analyzing its design. Anyway:
Elephant is big.
Elephant is strong.
The jungle shakes
As he tramps along.
But I think you'll find
He's gentle and kind.
Now I'm mad because they made me waste my five minutes.
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